I feel that the stepmother was just as rude an insensitive by showing up at the daughter's doorstep. She *knew* that the daughter didn't want to see her, and she pulled out all the stops, bringing the kids presents and having the mentally handicapped son come along.

Some would think that she was trying to guilt the daughter into being nice to her. ("How can she be so rude after I brought presents for her babies? And in front of my mentally challenged son, too!")

If the stepmother didn't want the son's feelings to be hurt, she shouldn't have led him to the doorstep of someone who has already indicated that she doesn't want to interact with him.